Coincidence?

Something so profound, so unexplained, so, well, God, happened yesterday in support of Significance of a Princess Warrior. My morning began at a fever pitch - rushing, trying to get everything done and make my chiropractic appointment by 9:00. Unfortunately, as with any “rush,” nothing seemed to go right. I was 15 minutes late to my appointment (if you know me at all, punctuality is as important as bathing and brushing my teeth).

At the chiropractor’s office, a sweet lady commented on a shirt I was wearing that had Psalms 45:11 on the sleeve. I had purposely worn this shirt - it was hanging in the laundry, easy access! And my morning had not lived up to this scripture so far:

Let the king be enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord. Psalm 45:11

As my new friend and I talked about the scripture, I learned she is a minister in Claremore. When she asked what I do, thankfully the Office Manager piped in and said “She has written a Bible study called Significance of a Princess Warrior.” Thank you God, because my first thought when someone asks me the question of what I do “for a living,” is to shy away - I don’t want to tell them that I have a number of autoimmune issues that keep me from working a full-time job (as if telling them I’m a writer isn’t the truth).

In honor of brevity (or long story short), we left the chiropractor’s office with the agreement that my new friend would get advance copies of the Significance of a Princess Warrior curriculum for her to lead the women of her church through! She was so excited that God had met a prayer for her women that she could not wait until the final published version is available later this year! Praise God!

Now here’s the “coincidence” part - as we left, I shared that I was thankful I was 15 minutes late to my appointment. My new friend then smiled a huge smile and informed me that she was a full hour and a half EARLY! Now tell me - a coincidence? or God flexing his mighty muscles and reassuring me that He has brought us here “for such a time as this.”

...And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this? Esther 4:14

Thank you for supporting me through this journey! Time is short to fund publishing of this Bible study. Please continue to pray that women will be “lead into their SIGNIFICANCE in Christ!”

Shalom

Significance of a Princess Warrior

Dating - Part Two

Yesterday I shared my Top 5 dating requirements and a few of the men who met those requirements but definitely weren’t my “Forever Men.” In today’s post I want to share where I have taken a stand, and what changes I have made in my dating life.

1. TAKE A STAND FOR SEXUAL PURITY.

In our world filled with pressure from television, movies, social media, even friends, it can be difficult to take a stand of sexual purity. Pressure in the dating world is intense. A common question I’ve gotten after I go on a first date is “Did you kiss him?” We are bombarded with the expectation that, because a man and a woman go on a date, there must be some kind of sexual attraction. And, since there must be sexual attraction, then we are expected to give in to a kiss, a harmless body exploration, or even sex.

While I haven’t been pure throughout my life, after renewing my commitment to God, I have an overwhelming desire to be sexually pure in any future relationship.

I am taking a stand against giving in to any real or perceived sexual attraction. It isn’t always easy, and unfortunately, some of my one-or-two-date-wonders failed to understand.

Here is an example of a text I received from one of these less than understanding men:

“If you were here, I’d kiss you right on those soft lips of yours.  It’d be soft but firm and somewhat passionate, such that you would know you had been kissed.”

Sounds romantic right? Something you would read in a love novel or hear on daytime television. Words most women might yearn to hear? To me, because I had already shared my desire to stand for sexual purity, this text actually made me angry and frustrated. This guy was funny, friendly, seemed to be a gentleman at dinner and stable.

Why did he have to go there?

It made my decision on whether or not to pursue a relationship actually quite easy. I explained to him, once again, my stance and thanked him kindly for a lovely dinner.

I then did what any respectable woman would do –

I cried!

I asked God: Why? What am I doing wrong? Each man with whom I’ve gone out on a date has met the 5 item criteria. And God, the first requirement was that they be Christians! So seriously, where am I failing?

God gently nudged me with his response. (I think he was gentle because he was freaked out that I was crying – I am NOT a crier!) He said:

It is not enough for a man to confess to be a Christian. He MUST be a God-First, Family-Second man. I honor your Stand for sexual purity, Robyn, but it is your criterion that needs adjusting.

2.  TAKE A STAND FOR A GOD-FIRST MAN.

It is not enough to be a Christian! This is a truth I know and embrace, so why wouldn’t I expect any potential Forever Man to feel the same? Since I am a God-First Princess Warrior, my Forever Man must equally be a God-First Warrior!

With that, my requirements were overhauled. To be considered for a date (which, in my case, is an interview for a Forever relationship, a man absolutely MUST:

• Be a God-First, Family-Second man;
• Share my desire to refrain from sexual immorality; and of course
• Not ask to drive my car, until we are at least committed girlfriend/boyfriend. Only then would Roxanne (my Camaro) understand.

In a God-First relationship, Princess Warrior and Warrior alike will agree that, although sexual desire can be overwhelming, our desire to live for Christ is more important.

Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. 3For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. 4When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.  Colossians 3:1-4 NIV

It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4that each of you should learn to control your own bodyin a way that is holy and honorable, 5not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; 1 Thes. 4:3-5 NIV

What about you? Whether married or, like me, out in the dating work, are you taking a stand for sexual purity? Are you being a good example to those who may be watching?

Father, I pray that as I take a stand as a God-First Princess Warrior, you will honor my stand and provide a God-First Warrior. I pray that, while I am a flawed and sinful human, that the example I set for those watching will be one that is pleasing to you and reflect your Kingdom desires.

I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am SIGNIFICANT in Christ. I will fight the good fight as a Princess Warrior for the Lord.

Do you or someone you know desire to become a Significant Princess Warrior? Consider supporting through prayer and/or financial contribution the publishing of Significance of a Princess Warrior, a 10-week study of Biblical Princess Warriors who have gone before. 

Dating - Criteria for a Forever Person

Dating is not for the faint of heart. Reviewing applications and interviewing potentials for a Forever Man (or Woman) can be overwhelming. Whether looking for a Forever Companion, or just wanting someone to “hang out” with, we generally have an idea of the qualities we desire most in a date.

When beginning the dating journey after divorce, I felt I had a good Top 5 list of requirements. To be considered for a date, a man must: 

• ·      Be a Christian.
• ·      Be truly single (not “separated” or “it’s complicated”).
• ·      Have a good job and demonstrated stability.
• ·      Be able to laugh at himself and have a good sense of humor.
• ·      NOT ask to drive my car (Roxanne and I are tight – it’s just plain rude to expect me to turn her over to some unknown man who doesn’t understand her complexity).

I followed this criterion completely, with little success. Here are a few of the guys who filled the Top 5 and were granted a first date. (Their names have been changed solely for my enjoyment, cuz I'm twisted that way.)

•  Barney Fife – looked just like this iconic television character – and was even in law enforcement! I knew he wasn’t my type pretty quickly, but it was solidified when he left less than a 10% tip for dinner (and I knew one of the waiters from church).
• Hands Guy – held my hand in the car on the way to our first date, and insisted I sit in the booth next to him at the ice cream shop – even after I asked him to move to the other side so I could see him when we talked. Personal space, Hands Guy, personal space!
• Deli Dave – met him at the deli. On our date, he wore a 1980s tracksuit that hadn’t seen a washing machine since it was manufactured. Clearly, he wore his best jeans and t-shirt to the deli!
• Needy guy – expected immediate response to all text messages. Once even used the line “oh, you ARE alive” after it had been an hour between return texts – and I was at work, where I was being paid to work, not send texts.

This is just a sampling. There are more that may someday become a comedic stand-up routine!

Not all men were one-date- wonders. Some made the first cut and were candidates for a second meeting. However, systematically, one by one each were eliminated. 

And they all had one thing in common.

Tune in tomorrow to learn what the second or third-date potentials had in common that took them out of the running to be my Forever Man.

Here’s a hint:

For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. 1 Thessalonians 4:7

If you’re single, what are your Top 5 Requirements? Where do you take a stand when it comes to anyone “applying” to be your Forever Person?

Check back tomorrow - I will share what these guys all had in common, and how God changed the way I look at dating.

I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am SIGNIFICANT in Christ. I will fight the good fight as a Princess Warrior for the Lord.

Do you desire to know what it means to be a Significant Princess Warrior? Consider supporting through prayer and/or financial contribution the publishing of Significance of a Princess Warrior, a 10-week study of Biblical Princess Warriors who have gone before. 

Manuscript Review

I wanted to post this last week, but have been a bit under the weather.

I received the review of Significance of a Princess Warrior from the publisher, Xulon Press. Ecstatic, euphoric, humbled, honored, dancing with joy and just plain giddy - these words don't touch the surface of the happiness I felt when reading the review!

Here's what Xulon Press had to say:

Manuscript Observations

·  Voice is intelligent, conversational, earnest, and reverent. There is no denying this author’s passion for her subject.

·  Wonderfully interactive. Equally suitable for individual study or as a teaching tool for small or large groups.

·  Considering its brevity, this is a remarkably comprehensive work that explains with ample scriptural support that it is not only possible but critical that a Christian woman never become an ornament. There is battle to be done, and God empowers women who seek after Him with everything they need to win the fight. Though the rest of the world may underestimate you, never underestimate yourself.

·  This is a solid, well-written book.

God is good! He said there was a book in me, and He was right (of course) - together, we are one step closer to getting Significance of a Princess Warrior published. My goal is to have it into the hands of women at the beginning of December. Hallelujah!

Most of you know I have dealt with several musculoskeletal disorders, but in the midst of these health issues, I have felt more joy and peace and at any other time in my life. This is a direct result of being smack-dab in the middle of God's will!

David said in Psalm 16:

Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the Lord, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me. I keep my eyes always on the Lord. With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure, because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead, nor will you let your faithful one see decay. You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand. Psalm 16:5-11 NIV

If you believe in this work, would you consider supporting Significance of a Princess Warrior through prayer and/or financial contribution?

Through God's grace, direction and the obedience of this sinful human, women will recognize their SIGNIFICANCE in Christ!

Thank you! Shalom

Yes, I would like to support Significance of a Princess Warrior.